22 January 2008

Inappropriate Crush #642: I'm in Love With 3B

I'm beginning to think that Armistead Maupin could have set Tales of the City in my apartment building.

No, really.

I've never lived in a place that's so chock full of The Gays. Across from us are the Giant Gays (both over 6'2", but in truth we just call them that -- I'm no longer convinced they're both gay), and directly under us are the Mini-Gays (both short and adorable), and I'm the Medium Gay (though in truth, at 5'7", I think in some people's books I count as a mini-gay as well).

And then there are the assorted gays sprinkled throughout the remaining thirteen apartments in the building. A disproportionate number, if you go by the old 10% rule.

I'm just saying.

Anywho, all of this brings us to my most recent inappropriate crush: The guy in apartment 3B.

He's thin-without-being-skinny, and bearded without being too hairy, and he has sorta dreamy eyes. And, of course, he's, like, twelve. Figuratively. Of course, everyone under the age of thirty-five looks like they're twelve to me.

Alas, I have no picture to share. So you'll have to settle for a picture of Jake, who he kinda resembles, only skinnier.

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