22 October 2002

Durham!

Durham was, in a word, delightful. The pace of the city is really laid back, and I'm not entirely sure I could deal with that for any length of time, but boy, it sure was relaxing. It was wonderful to see Jay and Lissa, and I really enjoyed the production of Loves Labours Lost that Jay's company, Shakespeare & Originals did.

The flight down to Durham was really very pretty; we had to climb through some rain showers leaving New York, but once the plane got above that set of clouds and started heading south, it got really pretty. I had one disconcerting moment, though. I hadn't really realized that this would be the first time I would fly out of New York (or fly at all, for that matter) since September 11, 2001 - and you all know how I used to go on and on about seeing Manhattan from the air. Well, as I said, there was cloud cover and light rain at the airport as we took off, but as we turned south and skirted the western edge of the island, the clouds broke just long enough for me to look down into the gaping hole that was the World Trade Center. It was very eerie, seeing that from the air. It made it all somehow more present, since I've managed to avoid actually going to the site and doing the whole introspective remembrance thing.

I really should go down there; you'd think that curiosity would get the better of me, but it hasn't. I don't really feel obliged to be in physical proximity to the place where it happened to feel empathy and sympathy for the victims.

Can I ask you something? I realize this is rhetorical, since you're not actually gonna answer me back, but I know that some of you who read these entries regularly might reply, so for what it's worth:

You know how I feel about forwarded junk e-mail, right? And we all know that I have a bit of inbred hostility toward obnoxiously or overtly religious messages, right? My faith, such as it is, is a quieter kind. Anyway, not long ago, someone forwarded me an e-mail with a picture attached, and the picture was of a plane flying into one of the towers amidst a huge fireball. I'm assuming that it had been doctored in some way to catch the moment in all its horror so perfectly. And the caption on the photo read something like, "In remembrance of the lost, may those angels be with our savior in heaven."

Am wrong in think this is crass and tasteless?

Not to mention an insult to anyone on this person's vast (and I mean vast - another pet peeve of mine... people who forward things to huge lists of people whose e-mail addresses are just listed there for spammers to get their hands on) distribution list who happens not to be Christian. That kind of Christian arrogance boils my blood.

So I wrote this person back, and I'll admit I was a little short about it: "That was the tackiest thing I've ever seen. Please, please, please don't ever send me anything like that again." I got a reply that said, "And I can't believe you'd be so tacky. Don't worry, you'll never hear from me again." Which, frankly, wasn't a big loss, 'cuz this person was one of those snotty little pricks who (a) think that forwarding you some stupid little Christian pablum every couple of months amounts to "keeping in touch," (b) is haughty and superior about how much smarter and more adjusted they are than anyone else around them, and (c) is quick to pass judgment on others then gossip about them.

I just don't get how anyone could not understand that I live in the city where that horrible mess happened and don't need that picture to help keep those people in my mind. For chrissakes, the subway trains had to be re-routed around the area up until a couple weeks ago. People living here think about it every fucking day! If you wanted to offer some sort of memorial to those who died, why for fuck's sake would you use such a horribly graphic picture?!?

I'll never understand people, that's for sure.


Anyway, I made it to Durham (or, as some of the locals call it, "Doy-um") and was met by Jay O'Berski. It was so nice to see Jay. I really learned to like him a lot on Aristocrats. It's rare that you meet someone who's so smart and so challenging and at the same time has such a calming presence. He seems to me to be such a centered guy.
Once we got back to the car, I got to see lovely Masha, Jay's dog. Isn't she a cutie? Masha doesn't like being left alone, so she goes everywhere Jay goes. She doesn't seem to have a problem being left in the car - just so long as she know's she's coming along, she's fine.

On the way back from the airport, we stopped and gave Masha a nice long walk in the Duke Forest. Everything in Durham seems to be named after the Dukes, who, of course, founded Duke University, which is also in Durham.

The other natural highlight of the weekend was going to the Sarah Duke Gardens on Sunday morning. Some of the most beautifully landscaped gardens I've ever seen. The picture to the left captures something I've never seen before: a Loblolly Pine. How about that thing? It looks like it's covered by dragon's scales. The gardens reminded me of a smaller, more well-kept Central Park. After our brunch, we stopped and Lissa picked up some bread to fee the ducks in the pond. And Masha got a nice walk outta the deal, too. I love the picture on the right; I think of it as my very own American Gothic.

The weekend tired us all out... but none so much as Masha!

The other highlight of the trip - actually the main reason for my going to Durham in the first place - was seeing Jay's production of Loves Labours Lost, done by Shakespeare & Originals, Jay's company.

The show was great. I was amazed at what the company managed given it's limited resources. The set was really very cool, and the lighting was clever. Best of all were the performances, though, which befits a group of actors working on Shakespeare. Jay had the idea to cast all the lovers a little older than usual - they're almost always played by people in their 20s, but he cast people who were in their 50s and 60s, and it made some of Shakespeare's protestations about giving up on love in scholastic pursuits really made a lot more sense coming from someone who'd lived long enough to really understand what they were asking themselves to give up. I thoroughly enjoyed it; and the production illuminated the script for me in ways I hadn't thought of it before.

So now I'm back in New York for a while - at least until little Abby Coffee's christening next month. Did I tell you that Mike Coffee's wife Terri had given birth to their first daughter? And I'm gonna be the god father! I know, I know. You all think that a faithless bastard like me can't be someone's godfather. Well, whether or not the church will let me be a godfather is yet to be seen, but aside from that, I'd like to remind you that this isn't about my beliefs, it's about my keeping my word to see that the child is raised according to her parents beliefs if something should happen to them. I'd like to think that I'm an honorable enough guy to follow through on that promise, even if I do think the church is chock full of shit. I can keep my editorial comments to myself until she's old enough to make up her own mind.

I stayed a little late at work on Monday, and as I made my way to the subway, I saw this view of the Chrysler Building - one of my favorite buildings in New York. So I snapped this picture, but alas, as the light was low and I didn't have my tripod, it came out a little fuzzy. Someday, my friends, I'm gonna either develop more skill as a digital photographer, or a steadier hand.

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